Hello chronic painers and friends,
I haven’t posted in a while. It’s not that I haven’t had pain — oh no, chronic neurological conditions don’t brake for miracles — or that I haven’t had the burning desire for public emotional purges; it’s that there’s nothing new to write about!
Managing this crap is still non-linear. Set-backs and losses still mess with my sense of self. It’s still hard to let go of past abilities. And I’m still frustrated by the added height and drops migraine lends to life’s little roller coasters.
There has been progress (italics to denote how I don’t really trust the term). Sometimes now it is just a bit easier to say “No, I don’t teach music anymore. Just English, but I really like it.” It’s also sometimes easier to ride out the acute depression and pain of an attack when I know I’ve gotten through it so many times before to have a good day on the other side. I have an incredible specialist who allows me access to cutting edge treatments, which probably means I have as many good days as possible. I am able to negotiate a social life way more often now than this time last year. This is all good stuff! But I guess what I mean to get across here is that despite many triumphs and improvements and steps forward,
So lately, since re-writing blog posts is pretty redundant, I’ve been thinking about writing cheesy affirmations like:
YOU ARE DOING A FINE JOB.
YOU ARE WORTH IT.
YOU ARE ENOUGH.
YOU CAN LIVE A LONG, FULL LIFE.
PEOPLE LOVE YOU.
YOU LOVE PEOPLE.
CATS LOVE YOU.
YOU LOVE CATS.
CHOCOLATE. DON’T FORGET CHOCOLATE.
Perhaps I will paint these on something, or stitch them lovingly into a frilly pillowcase. Which one should I get tattooed across my chest? Mum?
Any other affirmations floating out there in the blogosphere for me?